Lilypie1st Birthday Ticker
Friday, March 10, 2006
Good lord, we watch too much television.
So my hubby Jason is a CPA. Works as a senior auditor for a big corporation in Baltimore. And at the end of this month, he's leaving for three weeks (*gasp*) for a business trip to India and China. Although I have about 1% knowledge of what he actually does, he essentially is going to be auditing the company's manufacturing locations in those two countries.

Anyway, last night he tells me that he's been given some major power while on this trip. In China, the company COO has given him carte blanche to FIRE anyone who he discovers is doing anything wrong or fraudulent. Pretty impressive. So picture this conversation we had, which happened while we were watching the American Idol elimination show.

JASON: So he says I can fire anyone, no questions asked.

KELLY: Wow, honey. That's some power.

JASON: So picture it... I'll line them up and have them stand in two rows. I'll go through the back line first. "Chen, you submitted an expense report late. I commented that you should have been more punctual. Somebody's going home, and Chen... you are safe."

Now on to Lee... "Lee, you really hit it out of the park last night. I told you that Iwas really impressed with your hard work. Lee... you may sit down. You are safe."

"Now to Sying. Sying, not your best performance. You've stolen from the company and fucked up the whole operation. Also, if you'd picked a better song to sing while commiting the fraud, that would've made it a lot better. One person going hom today... and Sying...... ...... ..... you're fired." (insert Donald Trump voice and hand gesture here.) (add karate move for good measure)

KELLY: (laughing) You're terrible.

JASON: Then you're fired (hand gesture) too!

So you wonder, is my husband actually WANTING to fire people? I don't think so. But come to think of it, he was walking around all night muttering the Trump line. "You're fired. You're fired. You're fired." (complete with hand gesture. And using other hand to smash his hair into a god awful comb-over)

Power... coupled with the evil meanness of American Idol and the Apprentice. It's a potent thing. Wonder if my husband will get his ass kicked in China... beaten by these people who don't get our reality TV humor. Anyway, gotta run... I tivo'd Survivor and I need to watch it. (Hey, maybe he should offer immunity to one of them too?? Good idea!)


Blogger AnnaBana said...

LOL. Your husband sounds hilarious. But don't tell him so, cuz ya know what they say..."power + ego = too many good chinese accountants getting fired!"

Blogger Silly Hily said...

HA! That was too funny.

Blogger Isabel said...

I love this. I wish I had power like that!

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