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Thursday, March 01, 2007
Larger than life
Most of the time, I truly like my job. Being a news anchor is challenging, interesting, and sometimes a little glamorous. Plus, I get paid to talk, which, for anyone who knows me, is like paying me to eat. Not a bad deal. But lately, it has been different. Work hasn't been as much fun. Why? Because of this boy growing in my belly.

Maybe some people would love to document their pregnancies on television every day. They might appreciate having a "taped history" of the miracle that is gestation... seeing their bellies grow and having it captured on TV for all to see.

Well, it was cute for about a month, when my little baby belly made me look like I'd swallowed a soccer ball and I had graduated from the "is she fat or is she pregnant" phase. My little belly was so cute! All round and rubbable. On camera, you could definitely tell that I was pregnant, but I looked like I was still in proportion.

But not anymore! This boy is growing like crazy, and I am looking more cow-like every day. I sort of cringe when I catch a glimpse in one of the studio monitors, because The belly... it is TAKING OVER. Run for your lives! Then there's the issue of my face. I've always had a round face, but apparently pregnancy likes to attack my cheeks. They're now of the chipmunk variety. Cute.

Trying to maintain a semi-professional look on-air ain't easy, either. All of these great suits that I own? Yeah, they don't fit. And maternity clothes? Not so cute or sexy. I'm getting by with maternity pants and shirts, with one of my regular suit jackets on top (unbuttoned, of course.) But I have recently discovered that it isn't just my belly that's growing. My suit jackets are getting tight around my arms and back. Back fat. To quote Paris, that's hot. I honestly don't know my jackets can make it another 12 weeks. Yes, 12 weeks. 'Cause my dumb self actually plans to work up until I have this baby.

Which brings me to my greatest fear: going into labor DURING A NEWSCAST. Just picture it! You're watching the local news, getting updated on what's happened that day... when all of a sudden the anchor gasps and grabs her stomach. Her co-anchor recoils in disgust and horror as he realizes that her WATER HAS JUST BROKEN. ON THE SET. ON THE AIR. IN FRONT OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE. Knowing my luck, this could actually happen. And oh, boy, would I ever have a story to tell about how my baby entered this world!

Really, though, all complaining aside, I know I am lucky. I have a great job and a wonderful son on the way. But ya can't blame me for despising high-definition TV just a little right now. Can you?


Blogger Rachel said...

Fortunately, labor doesn't usually start with the OMG kill me pains. It normally starts with mild cramping and back pain (nothing like what it's like in the movies and on tv where the very first pain will bring you to your knees) so chances are you won't have to worry about the viewing public, lol. I've had two kids and both of my labors were like that.

Blogger The Hilarazzi said...

No. If I worked in TV I would hate HDTV. With a living passion. With that said, I'm sure you still look absolutely adorable.
Also, most of the time, it doesn't happen as fast as you see on TV. The labor that is. There is no instant pain and grabbing of the stomach. And most of the time (I'm saying most) the doctor ends up having to break your water for you. Only a small percentage of women have had their water break in public. You'll know when thing are happening. It'll all just feel different. But it won't be instand pain, instant OMG.
But if it was and if your water did break while delivering a news cast, dude, that would be SO cool!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Given that my labor was started FOR me, all's I can say is "what Rachel and Hilarazzi said".

And, when I was pregnant, I thought I was this ginormous cow-type but, everyone always said I was cute (all boobs and belly, baby!!). Of course, maybe they said that to keep the pregnant chick from bitch slapping them??'re adorable. And, your viewers? Probably love that they get to see you as you build that baby. One of our local news anchors was pregnant a while back and it was cute to see her grow and when ANOTHER anchor mentioned she'd had the baby, it was all "Awww..good for her."

Sorry this is so annoyingly long. Really, I am :)

Blogger janet said...

oh man, I can't even imagine being on camera every day and I am not pregnant. But honestly? you are so beautiful and I am sure you do not look at all cow-ish. Promise.

PS I saw your Advice Smackdown question. Do you think your work will be flexible with you post-baby?

Just go into labor during the entertainment news segment! That would be better than any of the Paris Hilton stories that frequent the news so much lately!

Blogger Lucky Gem said...

I was going to saw what Rachel and Hilary said. I was always afraid my water would break while I was shopping at Target. Only after giving birth did I learn that not many women's water breaks on their own. And mine didn't either.

Blogger Lizzy said...

Motherhood Maternity has some cute professional outfits. And for a bit more money, check out A Pea in the Pod and Mimi Maternity (or perhaps where you live there's a Destination Maternity, in which all of these great places are in one spot...with a special maternity spa, too! Woot!)
Fortunately, I was in a very low-fi work environment during my pregnancy and I was able to skoot through every day in jeans and top.
I was going to say what both Rachel and Hil said, but they said it. My major pregnancy fear was delivering in the Brooklyn Battery Tunnel.
22 hours after induction... well, not so easy!
And, you look beautiful no matter what--you're growing a BABY!

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